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Ok, so maybe you started smoking thinking it looked cool and that it might affect your sex life to look cool, or be grown up or rebellious or whatever.
You are of course totally correct in assuming that smoking affects your sex life. In fact, several recent studies have looked at exactly this question in regard to male impotence and found that there is a link between smoking and difficulties having an erection. Now tell me how cool is that? That is surely far too grown up, that is as grown up as your aged grandfather!
Smoking has been linked to coronary artery blockage, but now we know that arteries in the penis are damaged by smoking, too. In a study of men with penile artery blockage (average age 35), the smokers were significantly more blocked than non-smokers. And the more they smoked, the more their arteries were blocked. Since erections are mainly caused by blood flowing into the penis through arteries, unclogged arteries are very important in enhancing one's sex life.
Nicotine is a vasoconstrictor, meaning it tightens blood vessels and restricts blood flow. In the long term, it has even been shown to cause permanent damage to arteries. Since a man's erection depends on blood flow, researchers assumed smoking would affect erections. Studies have confirmed this time and again. In one study published in 1986 in Addiction Behavior, it was shown that just two cigarettes could cause softer erections in male smokers. Results are corroborated by a definitive study published in June 2001 that looked at all studies done on impotent men over the last two decades. The research showed that 40 percent of men affected by impotence were smokers, as opposed to 28 percent of the general male population. Interesting eh?
So what does all this discussion about impotence mean for women? During sexual arousal, the labia, clitoris, and vagina also swell up with blood, similar to a man's penis, enhancing sensation and arousal. If nicotine can restrict blood flow and cause erectile dysfunction in men, it can be assumed that blood flow is restricted in women as well, and may have a negative effect on sensation.
In the British Medical Associations report: "Smoking and Reproductive Life", the report states that Women who smoke take longer to conceive. Among smokers, the chances of conceiving fall by 10 – 40 per cent per cycle. The greater the quantity of cigarettes smoked, the longer a woman is likely to take to achieve pregnancy.
Cigarette smoking can also affect male fertility: smoking reduces the quality of semen. Men who smoke have a lower sperm count than non-smokers, and their semen contains a higher proportion of malformed sperm. By-products of nicotine present in semen of smokers have been found to reduce the mobility of sperm.
Of course, quitting smoking would also eliminate stained teeth, unhealthy skin, rapid accumulation of wrinkles on the face, and clothing, hair, and breath that stink of smoke. That might improve one's sex life. Decreasing your risk of cancer and heart disease — which also do tend to have negative effects on one's sex life — can also be sexy in the long run.
Smokers may have enjoyed a sexy image in the past, but research tells us that they are not "doing it" as often as non-smokers. Studies show that men between 25 and 40 years who smoked one or more packs per day had sex less often than non-smoking men of the same age. Another study suggested that carbon monoxide in the blood caused by smoking inhibits the production of testosterone (a hormone that creates sex drive).
Lastly, smoking affects fertility. Smokers' sperm come in many sizes and shapes - many of them not normal. Some have two tails or two heads, others have giant or tiny heads, and some have split tails. The more a man smokes, the worse the damage. Nicotine essentially poisons the sperm and its ability to fertilize an egg.
Smoking isn't good for your lungs or heart as is very well documented, and it certainly isn't good for your sex life. It is no longer cool. Are you sleeping with an inactive ashtray? Is your libido being smoked away?
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Excerpt from The Steroid Deceit
Having abused steroids for three and a half years, I was always afraid of being found out. I took pains to keep my steroid use hidden from my parents. They thought my newfound muscles were the result of all the time I spent at the gym, as well as the various supplements and powders that I always seemed to be taking. Little did they realize that some of those pills I called “vitamins” were actually oral steroids.
The façade to my life of deceit began to crack, when I received a panicked phone call from my mother. She had evidently found one of my syringes.
I rushed home. Since using steroids, I had become a much better liar than I ever could have imagined, and naturally I was ready to give her an Academy Award winning performance.
My mother was waiting for me at the front door, and started in on me as I made my way up the pathway. “Are you using heroin?"
“Mom,” I told her, offering her a big smile. “You’ve got it all wrong.”
She waved the syringe in her hand as if to say, “How could this be wrong?”
I didn’t stop smiling, even though inwardly I was cursing myself for having been careless with my needles. I had slipped up. Until that mistake I had always cleaned up after my usage and secreted everything away. While my mother brandished the syringe, I was doing some waving of my own, showing her a prescription form. By this time we were in the house.
“I am not a junkie, Mom,” I told her. “I was given a prescription from a doctor.”
“What for?” she asked.
“For steroids,” I said, “only steroids.”
She still looked doubtful, so I said, “I’ll go show you.”
I went up to my room and returned with a vial. “See,” I said, showing her the vial, and then repeated, “It’s only steroids.”
It’s only steroids. As a parent I can tell you that if I heard those words from one of my two boys I would be as concerned as if my child had announced, “Don’t worry, it’s only heroin.”
I made a big show of throwing out the syringe and vial in front of my mother, My mother appeared pacified. Luckily, she didn’t know anything about steroids, and what I was saying must have sounded reasonable. Besides, my tossing out the vial and syringe clearly demonstrated that I didn’t have a problem. What she didn’t know was that I had a secret stash in my closet with dozens more vials and needles.
It was also a good thing she didn’t look closely at the prescription, or she might have wondered why a vet was prescribing a drug to a human. In my hunt for bigger and better steroids I had found a veterinarian willing to write me a scrip for equipoise, a steroid prescribed for horses. As if that wasn’t bad enough, I had made copies of the prescription. I didn’t even have horse sense. I was a drug abuser with an illegal prescription covering up his habit by lying.
I wish my mother hadn’t trusted me. I wish she had challenged me. I wish she had taken note of all the warning signs my body and behavior were giving off, and had pulled me up short.
According to the U.S. Center of Disease Control, up to 6% of high school students have tried, or are using, steroids. Even if that figure is wildly exaggerated – even if it’s only half of that number – we are still talking about an incredible number of young people using steroids.
Teens typically use steroids to get buff, or try and get an athletic edge. What they don’t take into account is the potential hazards that come with the drugs.
Some of the side effects include: Psychological addiction; Depression and mood swings; Insomnia; Severe acne; Hair loss; Infertility; Liver disease; Testicular atrophy; Arteriosclerosis; Heart disease; Permanent stunting of growth; Feminization of males including breast swelling (gynecomastia – also known by steroid users as “bitch tits”); Stretch marks; Water retention; High blood pressure; Tendon and ligament damage
Specific side effects of females are: Virilization (becoming more masculine) of females, with such symptoms as excessive face and body hair, deepening of the voice which is irreversible; suppression of menses; decreased breast size; and enlargement of the clitoris;
It is hard to believe that given all the health risks associated with steroids that they continue to grow in popularity. I am afraid that either the message of their dangers isn’t getting out, or maybe it’s just that the other “message” is so much more prevalent that it’s hard to refute. When people look at the hard, muscled bodies presented by smiling, oversized human beings, they see a tempting portrait. Users and potential users are seduced by this picture of health and vitality. The picture doesn’t show the strain on the arteries, the wear and tear on the heart, or the pinball effect on the psyche.
Because society has not yet raised enough red flags over steroid use, the burden for this scrutiny has to fall on parents and loved ones. At the time I abused steroids they were an “under the radar” drug; my parents didn’t even know what they were. Public awareness about steroids has grown, but judging from their increased popularity, teens and adults have not yet come to the realization that using them means playing Russian roulette.
To protect their children from the dangers of steroids, parents need to be vigilant. For their own good, no child should be able to get away with what I did. It was wrong of me to pretend indifference about my drug habit and proclaim, “It’s only steroids.”
Steroid use is the hidden epidemic. Somehow the war on drugs has missed this target. Parents can’t afford to turn a blind eye, though. Among the warning signs parents should be looking for in a child who might be using steroids is: A rapid increase in the musculature of your child; Your child’s preoccupation or obsession with “getting big”; An outbreak of acne (predominately on chest and back) far and above the usual; Pronounced mood swings;The presence of muscle magazines (look for the usual smiling steroid figures on the cover). There’s an old axiom: if it’s too good to be true, beware. Those bodies are too good to be true;
Vials and pills and syringes – it is up to you to read the labels. I told my parents that the oral steroids I was taking were vitamins. Watch out for the following pills: Anadrol; Dianabol; Winstrol; tamoxifen; clenbuterol; clomifen citrate; masterolone
Anything in a vial is suspect (if it is in a vial, it is usually vile). The brand names are many and varied, but look for the following substances: stanazalol; nandrolone decanoate; nandrolone phenilpropionate; dromastolone dipropionate; and testosterone.
Despite all those misleading advertisements which claim you can lose 10 pounds of fat and put on 10 pounds of muscle in just a few days, it doesn’t happen that way. The human body doesn’t change overnight. When not using steroids, professional athletes are hard-pressed to put on 10 pounds of muscle in a year, even with rigorous workouts. If your child suddenly sprouts muscles, it is your job to be suspicious. Don’t be surprised if your teen credits those muscles to his or her pumping iron, and taking protein shakes and supplements. Speaking from experience, I can tell you that those pills and shakes are all but worthless. Invariably, the spokesperson for those kinds of products is a steroid abuser. The fact is that those supplements will not pack on the pounds and muscles as the manufacturers claim. Steroids will do that. They might also cause you to die or go crazy getting those muscles, but that’s not something you are ever likely to hear coming out of the mouth of Mr. Big Biceps.
What should a parent do if they discover that their child is using steroids? One of the first priorities is opening up a dialogue with your child and start discussing this risky behavior. One of my favorite sayings is, “There is nothing uglier than truth when it is not on your side.” Truth is a great antidote to combating steroid usage.
From the onset I would impress upon the child that what they are doing is both illegal and harmful. If you take a steroid, in the eyes of the law it’s the same thing as popping an amphetamine or Quaalude. Possession of steroids is a federal offense, and can result in jail time of up to one year in prison along with a fine up to a thousand dollars. If you manufacture or distribute steroids, the penalties are much more severe. It is common for many steroid users to sell or distribute their drugs. Doing a “favor” for another user can now result in a jail sentence.
Expect your child to be defensive. When you start explaining about health risks associated with steroids, you are sure to hear, “I don’t know anybody who has had those kinds of problems.” It is entirely possible they’ll be telling the truth. You will have to explain that sometimes the effects are not immediate, and sometimes they can’t be seen. Tell them that steroids are like cigarettes; often they debilitate over time.
You also have to try and impress upon them what I think of as “the X Factor.” Every day more evidence comes forward showing the detrimental effects of steroids. It’s only recently that steroids have been linked with depression, just as there have only been preliminary studies on steroids being a possible “gateway” drug. Before the mid-nineties, though, no one was talking about ‘roid rage. And before that no one had any idea about the potential for kidney damage and arteriosclerosis due to steroid usage.
Your child will tell you that steroids work, and he’ll be right. They do work, but it’s one of those cases of their working too well. Your child might not want to hear about heart disease or liver tumors or hardening of the arteries. You will hear about the strength gains, and the “incredible” workouts. Your response should be, “At what cost?” The human body is designed for certain maximum levels. Those who abuse steroids can, and do, spend more time at the gym or on the playing field, and are able to push themselves harder and longer. Sooner, usually than later, though, the human body rebels; joints tear and ligaments rip. It isn’t surprising that sports medicine has seen an epidemic of career ending injuries in the past decade. Steroids have given athletes a false platform upon which to perform; when that platform collapses, too often it is game, set, and match. This trend of serious injuries extends from high schools to the professional levels. Sports doctors say they are seeing a huge increase in tendon and muscle ruptures. That isn’t a coincidence. When bodies get pushed too hard, they snap even harder.
Student athletes are under enormous pressure to perform and that makes steroids tempting. Non-athletes feel their own pressures; everyone wants to look “buff” and fit. Parents should also tell their children that steroids are cheating. In simple terms of right and wrong, they are wrong, and you don’t want your child to be a cheater. If your son or daughter is looking for an athletic advantage, tell them that you don’t believe in winning at all costs and neither should they. Stress to them that the muscles they think they are getting are artificial and temporary, and if they want the real thing then they are going to have to work for it. Talk to your child and make sure his or her self-esteem is not dependent on body image. This will probably be another case where your child thinks you are old-fashioned and out of it; when your child grows up he will see how wise you were (but don’t expect to get thanked any time soon).
It is possible your child has body dysmorphia, with a resulting skewed view on what his/her body really looks like. Harrison Pope established a formula to calculate what he called the “fat-free mass index” (FFMI). Based on those calculations, the upper limits of musculature and build can be defined by their scoring system. The researchers found that a drug-free individual could be muscular, but in a proportional and natural way. Unfortunately, these days we see so many images of bodies accomplished through steroids that we don’t realize them for what they are – fakes. Teens need to have a realistic idea of what is normal body image, and what is abnormal.
When confronting a child’s usage of steroids, the natural reaction for any concerned parent is to ban steroids from the household. That prohibition won’t work, though, unless your child realizes it is in his own best interest to quit. Going off steroids is something that can be fraught with problems; consult with a doctor. Going “cold turkey” can have tragic consequences. If you get steroids out of your house, be aware that your child might seek out steroids through friends and find a way to try and hide further usage from you. Don’t be afraid of looking like the “bad guy.” Your child might not understand the serious consequences involved with steroid usage. If you suspect continued use of steroids, take your son or daughter to a physician and have them tested.
I would also strongly encourage you to get your child into counseling. Most males will resist this, and will no doubt insist that it’s unnecessary. These are the same males who might suffer severe depression in silence, not doing anything about it. Unfortunately their ultimate solution might be suicide. Without being overly dramatic, parents need to be on a “suicide watch” for a child that is using steroids, or has recently stopped. Coming “down” from steroids can be a perilous time, especially for young people. They need to understand what is happening to them. Because they have tinkered with their body chemistry, stopping steroid usage might result in considerable physical and mental shocks to the system.
When young men act rambunctious, people often roll their eyes and say, “Too much testosterone.” Imagine, then, too much testosterone for months and years at a time. Your child needs to know that’s what they wreaked upon their system, and that sometimes body and mind take time to find their way back to normal.
Take it from me; it will be one of the most important journeys they ever undertake.
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What is Sore Throat?
Almost everyone gets a sore throat at one time or another. Children tend to have them more often than adolescents or adults. Sore throats are most common during the winter months when upper respiratory infections (colds) are more frequent.
Sore throat (pharyngitis) is a painful inflammation of the pharynx, which is the part of the throat that lies between the mouth and the larynx (voice box). Sore throat is often a symptom of various illnesses such as colds and flu, glandular fever, respiratory tract infections, tonsillitis, and chickenpox. While most sore throats heal without complications, in some cases, they develop into a serious illness.
Causes of Sore Throat
The major cause of sore throat is infection. Sore throat may be caused by either viral or bacterial infections. But it can also be caused by allergies and environmental conditions.
Viral Sore Throat
Approximately 90% of sore throats are caused by viral infections. There is no simple way to distinguish a viral sore throat from a bacterial sore throat. Viral sore throats are quite contagious. They can be spread by personal contact and by coughing or sneezing. Cold and flu viruses are the main culprits. When a stuffy-runny nose, sneezing, and generalized aches and pains accompany the sore throat, it is probably caused by virus. For a viral infection, no antibiotic is usually needed and the infection can be expected to run a four to six day course.
Another group of viruses that cause sore throat are the adenoviruses. The adenoviruses usually cause infections of the lungs and ears. Adenoviruses may cause white bumps on the tonsils and throat, diarrhea, vomiting, and a rash. Sore throat caused by adenoviruse lasts about a week.
One particular virus responsible for causing sore throat is the coxsackie virus. This virus causes a disease known as herpangina, which occurs most commonly among children under the age of ten and is most common during the summer. It is sometimes called summer sore throat. Summer sore throat can be quite severe. Symptoms include a high fever and the presence of tiny grayish-white blisters on the throat and mouth. The blisters erupt in a few days and are followed by a scab which may be very painful.
Mononucleosis (mono) is a viral infection caused by the Epstein-Barr virus, a member of the herpesvirus group. This virus lodges in the lymph system, causing massive enlargement of the tonsils and swollen glands in the neck, armpits and groin. Mono can affect the liver, leading to jaundice (yellow skin and eyes). One of the main signs of mono is a sore throat that may last for 1 to 4 weeks. Mono is a severe illness in a teenager or young adult, but it is less severe in a child. Symptoms caused by mononucleosis can last for 4 weeks or more.
Bacterial Sore Throat
About 10% of all sore throats are caused by bacteria.
The most common bacterial sore throat is caused by a bacterium called group A Streptococcus. This type of sore throat is called strep throat. The pain of strep throat often feels much like sore throats caused by other bacteria or by viruses. The tonsils often swell and become coated and the throat is sore. The patient may have a high temperature, sour breath and may feel quite ill. If strep throat isn't treated it can sometimes result in rheumatic fever, which can damage the valves of the heart.
The most dangerous throat infection is epiglottitis, caused by bacteria that infect a portion of the larynx (voice box) and cause swelling that closes the airway. This infection is an emergency condition that requires prompt medical attention. Suspect it when swallowing is extremely painful (causing drooling), when speech is muffled and when breathing becomes difficult.
Noninfectious Sore Throat
Not all sore throats result from viral or bacterial infections. Sore throats can also be caused by allergies and environmental irritation. These forms of sore throat are not contagious.
Allergy: The same pet dander, molds and pollens that trigger allergic reactions such as red, swollen eyes and a runny nose can also cause a sore throat. Cat and dog danders and house dust are common causes of sore throats for people with allergies to them.
Irritation: Many materials in the environment can also irritate the pharynx. Such irritants include cigarette smoke, polluted air, chemical fumes, and dry air. During the cold winter months, dry heat may create a recurring, mild sore throat with a parched feeling, especially in the mornings.
Symptoms of Sore Throat
The symptoms for a sore throat caused by both bacterial and viral causes are the same:
pain in the throat
pain and difficulty in swallowing
red throat
swollen tonsils
coated tonsils
swollen neck glands
pus covering the throat or white spots
coughing
fever
If the sore throat is due to a viral infection the symptoms are usually milder.
Sore Throat Treatment
The treatment of sore throat will vary according to the cause. Sore throats are usually mild and can be treated at home with over-the-counter remedies available from your local pharmacy. They usually get better on their own, in 3-7 days. It is extra rare for antibiotics to be needed. This is only the case when the sore throat is the result of a serious bacterial infection.
Sore throat treatment and comfort measures:
Strep throat requires antibiotics. Sometimes it is difficult to determine whether the cause is viral or bacterial, so antibiotics may be prescribed as a precaution.
Pain relievers - nonsteroidal anti-inflammatory drugs, (such as aspirin, ibuprofen, and naproxen) are often more effective pain relievers than acetaminophen (Tylenol). These medications reduce pain and fever that accompany a sore throat. Children should not be given aspirin because of the risk of Reye's syndrome.
Salt water gargle can be a good way to relieve a sore throat. It help soothe the irritated throat and reduces swelling in the tissues. This is the safest, least expensive and probably the most effective treatment of a sore throat.
Use over-the-counter throat lozenges every couple of hours or hard candy. It can help relieve sore throat and cough. It does stimulate saliva production, which bathes and cleanses your throat.
Drinking enough fluids is very important, warm drinks may be especially soothing. Avoid caffeine because it can cause water loss.
Get plenty of rest. Getting extra sleep can promote more rapid recovery, especially if a virus is the cause.
Avoid smoking or being around smoke and other throat irritants.
Humidify the air. Adding moisture to the air prevents your mucous membranes from drying out. This can reduce irritation and make it easier to sleep. Hot, dry air will aggravate sore throat.
Take a high-potency multivitamin and the herb echinacea to build up your immune system.
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As a Horror writer I've been often and pointedly been asked why I write this stuff. It's not ever said directly, but it's always there: Is there something wrong with you? In my own defense, quite a few people enjoy reading this same stuff and even more get a thrill out of watching it on the big screen. Just to hazard a guess, I'd say most people have in their life read a horror book or seen a horror movie. The question then becomes: What's wrong with us?
My first occasions to hear horror stories was as a child in church. I was told that there was a man in a red suit and horns who carried a pitchfork and watched everything I did and wanted to send me to the worst, most horrible place ever if I did bad things. Worse than this, I was told that there was something called 'original sin' and just by being born I was on God's crap list and if I didn't repent for things I'd never done, the man in the red suit would still get me. It didn't seem quite fair to me that my little three year old wrong-doings could earn me the same trip to Hell that someone like Hitler got.
I was scared constantly. And that was the point of those stories, to scare little boys into behaving as their parents wanted them to.
Fairy tales have the same theme: Obey your parents, or bad things will happen. I can't swear that I remember all of my fairy tales, but I do remember as a child being - probably - unreasonably worried about being eaten. For the time, being eaten seemed about the worst thing that could happen to me and I looked warily at strangers trying to evaluate in my mind whether they would try and eat me. Fortunately, there were very few cannibals in Wisconsin at that time. Jeffrey Dahmer was one, but for the life of me, I can't think of any other Wisconsin cannibals. Oh, wait. Ed Gein - but that's it.
Parents frightening their kids is one thing, but why do people want to scare themselves? Did you ever wonder why you paid good money at the bookstore and at the movies for this service that your parents would happily provide you for free? Well, horror stories are about fear, but it's not just about making yourself scared - that alone is no fun. Horror stories are about conquering your fear, and the way they do that is symbolically by creating a monster that represents a fear and by having that monster defeated. Thus it helps you to overcome your subconscious fear/Monster by identifying with the destruction of the one in the story. Works out pretty neat, huh?
Here's how it plays out in a few familiar scenarios. Frankenstein, by Mary Shelley, was thought to the first real science fiction book, although it really is a horror story. In the story Victor Frankenstein discovers the secret of life - itself! As an experiment he creates for himself a man sewn together from cadavers and then embues it with life, and then seeing what an awful looking creature he's created, he abandons it. He does this because it looks so hideous, though for the life of me, I can't figure out why he had to make the thing out of several icky corpses instead of just finding one beautiful one and giving that one life. Anyways, the monster runs away and then comes back to haunt him and he has to destroy it.
The explanation for Frankenstein is that the monster represents science and the Victorian fear that science and progress had gone too far. Science, once the obedient servant of mankind, had, like Frankenstein's monster, broken free and turned against its master - us. A hundred or years later this same theme is echoed in the movie The Terminator, only this time the science that breaks free is computer science. Computers, our formerly docile servant, turn against us and band together to become one giant warlike mind which for some reason or other decides that all humans must perish throughout time. I guess we had it coming to us.
Vampires, another popular monster, have represented the once prevalent infectious disease that used to regularly wipe out giant swathes of human population. In modern times, Vampires have been reinterpeted to be kind of sexy, that is, they represent the dark sexual impulses people have inside themselves that they also think may destroy them. Vampire stories, then, become our victory over our dark, forbidden desires. Which are represented by those sexy, sexy vampires.
Sex is a constant theme in the slasher movies. The Scream movies brilliantly satirize this by having the teen-agers in the movie aware of the conventions of the genre they are living through, yet helpless to change them as those conventions become their fates. In the slasher movies young girls fear of their own sexual maturity is confronted symbolically by the slasher who represents teen-age boys through the menace of wielding the very Freudian penis/knife. You'll notice that the heroine that inevitably prevails in these movies is the virgin who never succombs to the temptation of sex and not coincidentally, does not succomb to the slasher, either.
My favorite monsters are the ones from the Japanese monster movies, Godzilla, Mothra, Rodan and, of course, Monster Zero. The reason I love these monsters is that they are political monsters. Think about it: Godzilla is a giant, super-powerful radioactive monster who comes from over the sea who is created by radioactivity and then attacks Japan with that same radioactivity. Sound familiar? (Hint: It's America). All these monsters from overseas are constantly attacking Japan and being beaten up by the cohesion of the Japanese people.
Now, the obvious question for me - being a horror writer and all - is: What are the symbolic monsters in my book, Breakfast with the Antichrist?
Well ... I'm not telling.
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As a Horror writer I've been often and pointedly been asked why I write this stuff. It's not ever said directly, but it's always there: Is there something wrong with you? In my own defense, quite a few people enjoy reading this same stuff and even more get a thrill out of watching it on the big screen. Just to hazard a guess, I'd say most people have in their life read a horror book or seen a horror movie. The question then becomes: What's wrong with us?
My first occasions to hear horror stories was as a child in church. I was told that there was a man in a red suit and horns who carried a pitchfork and watched everything I did and wanted to send me to the worst, most horrible place ever if I did bad things. Worse than this, I was told that there was something called 'original sin' and just by being born I was on God's crap list and if I didn't repent for things I'd never done, the man in the red suit would still get me. It didn't seem quite fair to me that my little three year old wrong-doings could earn me the same trip to Hell that someone like Hitler got.
I was scared constantly. And that was the point of those stories, to scare little boys into behaving as their parents wanted them to.
Fairy tales have the same theme: Obey your parents, or bad things will happen. I can't swear that I remember all of my fairy tales, but I do remember as a child being - probably - unreasonably worried about being eaten. For the time, being eaten seemed about the worst thing that could happen to me and I looked warily at strangers trying to evaluate in my mind whether they would try and eat me. Fortunately, there were very few cannibals in Wisconsin at that time. Jeffrey Dahmer was one, but for the life of me, I can't think of any other Wisconsin cannibals. Oh, wait. Ed Gein - but that's it.
Parents frightening their kids is one thing, but why do people want to scare themselves? Did you ever wonder why you paid good money at the bookstore and at the movies for this service that your parents would happily provide you for free? Well, horror stories are about fear, but it's not just about making yourself scared - that alone is no fun. Horror stories are about conquering your fear, and the way they do that is symbolically by creating a monster that represents a fear and by having that monster defeated. Thus it helps you to overcome your subconscious fear/Monster by identifying with the destruction of the one in the story. Works out pretty neat, huh?
Here's how it plays out in a few familiar scenarios. Frankenstein, by Mary Shelley, was thought to the first real science fiction book, although it really is a horror story. In the story Victor Frankenstein discovers the secret of life - itself! As an experiment he creates for himself a man sewn together from cadavers and then embues it with life, and then seeing what an awful looking creature he's created, he abandons it. He does this because it looks so hideous, though for the life of me, I can't figure out why he had to make the thing out of several icky corpses instead of just finding one beautiful one and giving that one life. Anyways, the monster runs away and then comes back to haunt him and he has to destroy it.
The explanation for Frankenstein is that the monster represents science and the Victorian fear that science and progress had gone too far. Science, once the obedient servant of mankind, had, like Frankenstein's monster, broken free and turned against its master - us. A hundred or years later this same theme is echoed in the movie The Terminator, only this time the science that breaks free is computer science. Computers, our formerly docile servant, turn against us and band together to become one giant warlike mind which for some reason or other decides that all humans must perish throughout time. I guess we had it coming to us.
Vampires, another popular monster, have represented the once prevalent infectious disease that used to regularly wipe out giant swathes of human population. In modern times, Vampires have been reinterpeted to be kind of sexy, that is, they represent the dark sexual impulses people have inside themselves that they also think may destroy them. Vampire stories, then, become our victory over our dark, forbidden desires. Which are represented by those sexy, sexy vampires.
Sex is a constant theme in the slasher movies. The Scream movies brilliantly satirize this by having the teen-agers in the movie aware of the conventions of the genre they are living through, yet helpless to change them as those conventions become their fates. In the slasher movies young girls fear of their own sexual maturity is confronted symbolically by the slasher who represents teen-age boys through the menace of wielding the very Freudian penis/knife. You'll notice that the heroine that inevitably prevails in these movies is the virgin who never succombs to the temptation of sex and not coincidentally, does not succomb to the slasher, either.
My favorite monsters are the ones from the Japanese monster movies, Godzilla, Mothra, Rodan and, of course, Monster Zero. The reason I love these monsters is that they are political monsters. Think about it: Godzilla is a giant, super-powerful radioactive monster who comes from over the sea who is created by radioactivity and then attacks Japan with that same radioactivity. Sound familiar? (Hint: It's America). All these monsters from overseas are constantly attacking Japan and being beaten up by the cohesion of the Japanese people.
Now, the obvious question for me - being a horror writer and all - is: What are the symbolic monsters in my book, Breakfast with the Antichrist?
Well ... I'm not telling.
